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I Know Dogs Aren't People But My Best Friend Could Use A Few Prayers Right Now
- Thread starter Critterhunter
- Start date
Critterhunter
New member
Thank you once again for all the kind words. I've tried to keep busy while she was alive in the hospital, as well as today when I knew she was dead. But honestly I just had to drink beer and get drunk with my neighbor and talk about things. It's not been easy, and she (my neighbor) knows what I'm going through, because she's owned many dogs over the years.
Two of my favorite pet names for her, besides "wolf pup", were "pole cat" because she was colored like a skunk, and "sweet pea", because I told her I often forgot she was a female because of her tendency to love to dig and get dirty. I'm probably well into the corny zone now, but my other pet name for her was "punkin puppy".
I'll never forget this "soul". I'm 44 and not married, so it's unlikely I'll ever have kids unless I marry a younger wife or she already has kids, or we end up adopting. For that reason this dog felt even more to me like "my girl". She was and is the only thing that has really made my life tolerable over the last few years for certain reasons.
You know, I've heard people argue in the past about wheather animals have souls or not. I never had any opinion on that one way or the other. But I can honestly say that since I've known this dog I could "see it" in her eyes. She knew things most humans wouldn't, and would provide comfort when nobody else knew you needed it. I believe God has bigger plans for the universe then even the more microscopic "view" of religion that I was brought up on in terms of Christianity. The older I get, the more I think the universe would have been a giant waste of materials and time just o have a few (even billion) people grow up on this little ball floating around in space. I now believe, as I get older, that God has greater plans than that for all of us. It's not just about what happens to humans when the pass on, but also about what happens the the "soul" or life force as other creatures as they pass on as well. A few years ago I would have told you you were nuts if you said something like that to me. That's the benefit of growing older. You start to see things in a much wider and bigger picture than just the small world that you grew up in. If anything, growing older does have it's benefits if you let your mind consider other possibilites.
What am I thankful for? I'm glad she didn't suffer for weeks or months, but then on the other hand a friend told me he's had animals die both ways...And he came to the conclusion that both ways suck just as bad. So, beyond that, what am I greatful for? Well...I'd have to say I'm thankful for knowing this special soul. She has made me a much better person.
It's funny, but about a month ago me and my neighbor were having a conversation about our dogs passing away. I told her that it would kill me when my Sky passed away, and that I would never own another dog because I just knew how much it would upset me. Now, one day into it, I have a different perspective. Sure, it blows big time that she's gone and I'm in a lot of pain, but on the other hand I would never trade the rich memories she has given me. For that reason I will get another dog in a heart beat. A few days ago, before this went down, I would have told you you were crazy if you said that to me. Now....? I know better. The love outweighs the pain.
That's why I know I'm a little older and wiser, because at one time in my 20's I was deeply in love with a girl. She was with me too, but being a young punk I took her for granted towards the end. 3 years later, there came a point where the pain now outweighed the pleasure in terms of her feelings for me. She warned me months ahead, and tried to help me see that I was destroying the love she had for me. I didn't listen, and after she left I swore I'd never love another thing as much as I loved her in order to protect myself. I tourmented myself about the kids we'd never have, and the memories I was robbed of, all by done by my very own hands of taking her for granted.
Now, years later, I now realize the risk is worth the potential pain. Don't let that fear of being hurt or in pain stop you from reaching out and connecting to and loving another creature with your heart and soul, human or not. I'm older and wiser enough now not to ever let me take for granted the love that girl had for me, or the feelings I had for her. And that's partly why I treated this dog as well as I did. For that, I thank life for teaching me that lesson. Still, you never feel you did enough. I feel I should have taken that dog on more walks and more car rides than I did. I guess you'll never feel you did enough in that respect.
But, I know one thing, if another women ever falls in love with me again and I feel the same about her, I'll not count on the fact that she'll always be there. Never take your loved ones for granted, human or animal. Make sure they know how much you feel for them. That, simply put, is the greatest lesson my long lost girlfriend taught me, and has only been re-confirmed by what Sky has taught me. Luckily I knew that enough by the time our two souls (Sky and me) met, but as always...You're going to feel that you could have done better. Next time I'll try even harder than I did this time, to make sure that dog, or that person, knows just how much they mean to me. I feel I did much better with Sky, but I still feel there is room for improvement in how I treat others around me...Human or animal...
Thanks again for all the kind words and support from everybody. You have no idea how much it's meant to me, and I REALLY mean that...
Two of my favorite pet names for her, besides "wolf pup", were "pole cat" because she was colored like a skunk, and "sweet pea", because I told her I often forgot she was a female because of her tendency to love to dig and get dirty. I'm probably well into the corny zone now, but my other pet name for her was "punkin puppy".
I'll never forget this "soul". I'm 44 and not married, so it's unlikely I'll ever have kids unless I marry a younger wife or she already has kids, or we end up adopting. For that reason this dog felt even more to me like "my girl". She was and is the only thing that has really made my life tolerable over the last few years for certain reasons.
You know, I've heard people argue in the past about wheather animals have souls or not. I never had any opinion on that one way or the other. But I can honestly say that since I've known this dog I could "see it" in her eyes. She knew things most humans wouldn't, and would provide comfort when nobody else knew you needed it. I believe God has bigger plans for the universe then even the more microscopic "view" of religion that I was brought up on in terms of Christianity. The older I get, the more I think the universe would have been a giant waste of materials and time just o have a few (even billion) people grow up on this little ball floating around in space. I now believe, as I get older, that God has greater plans than that for all of us. It's not just about what happens to humans when the pass on, but also about what happens the the "soul" or life force as other creatures as they pass on as well. A few years ago I would have told you you were nuts if you said something like that to me. That's the benefit of growing older. You start to see things in a much wider and bigger picture than just the small world that you grew up in. If anything, growing older does have it's benefits if you let your mind consider other possibilites.
What am I thankful for? I'm glad she didn't suffer for weeks or months, but then on the other hand a friend told me he's had animals die both ways...And he came to the conclusion that both ways suck just as bad. So, beyond that, what am I greatful for? Well...I'd have to say I'm thankful for knowing this special soul. She has made me a much better person.
It's funny, but about a month ago me and my neighbor were having a conversation about our dogs passing away. I told her that it would kill me when my Sky passed away, and that I would never own another dog because I just knew how much it would upset me. Now, one day into it, I have a different perspective. Sure, it blows big time that she's gone and I'm in a lot of pain, but on the other hand I would never trade the rich memories she has given me. For that reason I will get another dog in a heart beat. A few days ago, before this went down, I would have told you you were crazy if you said that to me. Now....? I know better. The love outweighs the pain.
That's why I know I'm a little older and wiser, because at one time in my 20's I was deeply in love with a girl. She was with me too, but being a young punk I took her for granted towards the end. 3 years later, there came a point where the pain now outweighed the pleasure in terms of her feelings for me. She warned me months ahead, and tried to help me see that I was destroying the love she had for me. I didn't listen, and after she left I swore I'd never love another thing as much as I loved her in order to protect myself. I tourmented myself about the kids we'd never have, and the memories I was robbed of, all by done by my very own hands of taking her for granted.
Now, years later, I now realize the risk is worth the potential pain. Don't let that fear of being hurt or in pain stop you from reaching out and connecting to and loving another creature with your heart and soul, human or not. I'm older and wiser enough now not to ever let me take for granted the love that girl had for me, or the feelings I had for her. And that's partly why I treated this dog as well as I did. For that, I thank life for teaching me that lesson. Still, you never feel you did enough. I feel I should have taken that dog on more walks and more car rides than I did. I guess you'll never feel you did enough in that respect.
But, I know one thing, if another women ever falls in love with me again and I feel the same about her, I'll not count on the fact that she'll always be there. Never take your loved ones for granted, human or animal. Make sure they know how much you feel for them. That, simply put, is the greatest lesson my long lost girlfriend taught me, and has only been re-confirmed by what Sky has taught me. Luckily I knew that enough by the time our two souls (Sky and me) met, but as always...You're going to feel that you could have done better. Next time I'll try even harder than I did this time, to make sure that dog, or that person, knows just how much they mean to me. I feel I did much better with Sky, but I still feel there is room for improvement in how I treat others around me...Human or animal...
Thanks again for all the kind words and support from everybody. You have no idea how much it's meant to me, and I REALLY mean that...
Critterhunter
New member
Gear Box, thanks.
Sorry, I wanted to add...
Yes, I forget sometimes and may say or do things that don't represent my true feelings, or how I should treat other people, but for the most part I'm much better at those things. In the end, I can say that I do try to treat people like I want them to treat me. Not always, I'm ashamed to say, but I do try to strive for that, or at least feel very guilty when I know I didn't live up to those self-imposed standards I've tried to set for myself.
So, let's wrap up this once again long ramble of mine and try to tie it up in a nice ball in terms of our favorite hobby of metal detecting. Don't get so caught up in who is doing what, or what machine might do better than another (I'm very guilty of that myself). But rather, just go out there and enjoy it and be grateful for a nice summer day and the mystery and lure of what you just might find today. In the end, if you don't even find something good, it's the journey that makes it worth the effort, or the good friends you share the experience with, and not so much about how much "bling" you've put in your apron at the end of the day. I know as I get older the friends I hunt with are more important to me than what I find, and I'm often just as thrilled to watch them dig a potential good find than I am digging one of my own. That's the true beauty of this hobby. If you don't feel that yet then give it a few years, and God willing your eyes will be open to that fact and you'll reap greater joy from it than any find ever could. Am I there yet? No, I'm not perfect. But I'm closer to that view than I have ever been before. So I pray it is for you...
Thanks again for all the kind words and support from everybody. You have no idea how much it's meant to me, and I REALLY mean that...
Sorry, I wanted to add...
Yes, I forget sometimes and may say or do things that don't represent my true feelings, or how I should treat other people, but for the most part I'm much better at those things. In the end, I can say that I do try to treat people like I want them to treat me. Not always, I'm ashamed to say, but I do try to strive for that, or at least feel very guilty when I know I didn't live up to those self-imposed standards I've tried to set for myself.
So, let's wrap up this once again long ramble of mine and try to tie it up in a nice ball in terms of our favorite hobby of metal detecting. Don't get so caught up in who is doing what, or what machine might do better than another (I'm very guilty of that myself). But rather, just go out there and enjoy it and be grateful for a nice summer day and the mystery and lure of what you just might find today. In the end, if you don't even find something good, it's the journey that makes it worth the effort, or the good friends you share the experience with, and not so much about how much "bling" you've put in your apron at the end of the day. I know as I get older the friends I hunt with are more important to me than what I find, and I'm often just as thrilled to watch them dig a potential good find than I am digging one of my own. That's the true beauty of this hobby. If you don't feel that yet then give it a few years, and God willing your eyes will be open to that fact and you'll reap greater joy from it than any find ever could. Am I there yet? No, I'm not perfect. But I'm closer to that view than I have ever been before. So I pray it is for you...
Thanks again for all the kind words and support from everybody. You have no idea how much it's meant to me, and I REALLY mean that...
JimmyCT
Well-known member
Critter,
So sorry for the loss of your pet. You are right on with your statement below - sometimes I get so wrapped up into detecting I need to back off. I need to remember this is just a hobby and nothing more. I have made some wonderful friends here on findmall and enjoy e-mailing and communicating as much as being out in the field. This hobby is also a wonderful one in that I get outside to enjoy the weather, make new friends, spend time with family, (brother and father like to go detecting), exercise, and truly enjoy the fact that I can still hear certain tones to enjoy the hobby. Take care Critter and again, sorry for the loss of your pet.
But rather, just go out there and enjoy it and be grateful for a nice summer day and the mystery and lure of what you just might find today. In the end, if you don't even find something good, it's the journey that makes it worth the effort, or the good friends you share the experience with, and not so much about how much "bling" you've put in your apron at the end of the day.
So sorry for the loss of your pet. You are right on with your statement below - sometimes I get so wrapped up into detecting I need to back off. I need to remember this is just a hobby and nothing more. I have made some wonderful friends here on findmall and enjoy e-mailing and communicating as much as being out in the field. This hobby is also a wonderful one in that I get outside to enjoy the weather, make new friends, spend time with family, (brother and father like to go detecting), exercise, and truly enjoy the fact that I can still hear certain tones to enjoy the hobby. Take care Critter and again, sorry for the loss of your pet.
But rather, just go out there and enjoy it and be grateful for a nice summer day and the mystery and lure of what you just might find today. In the end, if you don't even find something good, it's the journey that makes it worth the effort, or the good friends you share the experience with, and not so much about how much "bling" you've put in your apron at the end of the day.
Critterhunter
New member
Once again, thanks for all the kind words and support. It means a lot to me.
I am catching myself wondering if she's in the backyard or in the house, as I always liked to keep tabs on where she was. I also could swear a few times that I've heard her dog tags jingle as she walks through the house. This dog was forced on us several years back when a family member got a divorce. We found out the dog for several months was living alone in that house, and only being visited once a day to let out to go to the bathroom. When we heard that we said bring it over and we'll take care of it. Needless to say, even though our family hadn't had a dog in years, she very quickly grew on us.
Maybe in a few days I'll be visiting a husky shelter and get another one. It depends on financial reasons at this time that have to be weighed, because being out of work at the moment I really can't afford any future vet bills until I'm working again. Either way, for sure when I'm working again I will adopt another husky in a heart beat, if not even sooner here.
I am catching myself wondering if she's in the backyard or in the house, as I always liked to keep tabs on where she was. I also could swear a few times that I've heard her dog tags jingle as she walks through the house. This dog was forced on us several years back when a family member got a divorce. We found out the dog for several months was living alone in that house, and only being visited once a day to let out to go to the bathroom. When we heard that we said bring it over and we'll take care of it. Needless to say, even though our family hadn't had a dog in years, she very quickly grew on us.
Maybe in a few days I'll be visiting a husky shelter and get another one. It depends on financial reasons at this time that have to be weighed, because being out of work at the moment I really can't afford any future vet bills until I'm working again. Either way, for sure when I'm working again I will adopt another husky in a heart beat, if not even sooner here.
Critterhunter
New member
I was doing better today (hadn't shed a tear since yesterday) until somebody posted this for me in the Views forum. Darn I wish I hadn't read this...
BJ in Okla. said:
Critter - there are quite literally dozens of "loss of your pet" poems, stories and anecdotes that'll just tear your heart out to read right now. I don't care if you're a man or woman, most of them will make you cry like a baby if you have any sort of heart.
I've always believed that any person who treats an animal kindly and cries when they pass on is a person with a REAL HEART! I hope your finances allow you to get another dog when you're ready - I can guarantee you one thing, there's plenty of them out there who would love to have a person with a REAL HEART take care of them while they're alive.
If you need a little help dealing with the loss, these are two very good websites with lots of encouraging advice and "counsel." It's also a really great place to share any stories you might like to share with folks who completely understand how you feel:
http://www.pet-loss-matters.com/pet-quotes.html
http://www.petloss.com/
Great - now I'M tearing up myself!!!
I've always believed that any person who treats an animal kindly and cries when they pass on is a person with a REAL HEART! I hope your finances allow you to get another dog when you're ready - I can guarantee you one thing, there's plenty of them out there who would love to have a person with a REAL HEART take care of them while they're alive.
If you need a little help dealing with the loss, these are two very good websites with lots of encouraging advice and "counsel." It's also a really great place to share any stories you might like to share with folks who completely understand how you feel:
http://www.pet-loss-matters.com/pet-quotes.html
http://www.petloss.com/
Great - now I'M tearing up myself!!!
Critterhunter
New member
Thanks, but I've got to stay away from sites like that or it will just make things worse. 
That poem just about killed me. Thanks for the support, though.
That poem just about killed me. Thanks for the support, though.
n/t
Critterhunter
New member
Thanks Ron.
Thanks for the kind words everybody, and I can only imagine how hard it must be to know you are going to have to put a dog down. I'm just not strong enough of a person to ever be in the room if they ever have to do that with one of my future dogs. I feel for people who have had to do that, and have enough strength to hold them when they are given that shot. I just can't be there myself for that. It would kill me. Luckily Sky went without that decision having to be made.
You know, one other thing that should have told me that her feeling under the weather a bit all week was more than just her being in heat, besides the "look" in her eyes, was that she left a bacon treat lay on the floor for a day and a half. She always ate those things right up, and even when she was in heat she still had no problem woofing those things down.
The day before we found her sick in the basement she was waiting by her treats in the kitched for one, even though the one had sat on the floor over a day or so. I told her to go in the living room, as that's where I will sit and give her her treats. I told her to speak, meaning to bark, and she did. Funny, but she never barks. I taught her to do that for treats. She prefered to talk a lot with whimpers and small howls, but rarely if ever would bark.
After she barked once when I told her to speak I gave her the treat and she spit it out. Right then and there it should have been enough to know something more was wrong then being in heat. Maybe we could have saved her had we acted then. That night, she seemed to be feeling better and playing with a new toy, and would flop her head on the ground sideways and show me her teeth to tell me she was wanting to play, which I did a little bit with her as she laid in her bed beside me. That's why I never expected what I'd find the next morning.
Last night I had my window open in my bedroom. My door is the only one in the house that won't latch because it's broke, so she knew she could push the door open and come in my room and lay down, as she often did. With the window open it was windy, and so the door kept starting to make noise that it was opening. I kept catching myself thinking my girl was coming in the room to visit. After about 20 minutes of that torture I closed the window so it would stop.
Thanks again to everybody for words of support.
Thanks for the kind words everybody, and I can only imagine how hard it must be to know you are going to have to put a dog down. I'm just not strong enough of a person to ever be in the room if they ever have to do that with one of my future dogs. I feel for people who have had to do that, and have enough strength to hold them when they are given that shot. I just can't be there myself for that. It would kill me. Luckily Sky went without that decision having to be made.
You know, one other thing that should have told me that her feeling under the weather a bit all week was more than just her being in heat, besides the "look" in her eyes, was that she left a bacon treat lay on the floor for a day and a half. She always ate those things right up, and even when she was in heat she still had no problem woofing those things down.
The day before we found her sick in the basement she was waiting by her treats in the kitched for one, even though the one had sat on the floor over a day or so. I told her to go in the living room, as that's where I will sit and give her her treats. I told her to speak, meaning to bark, and she did. Funny, but she never barks. I taught her to do that for treats. She prefered to talk a lot with whimpers and small howls, but rarely if ever would bark.
After she barked once when I told her to speak I gave her the treat and she spit it out. Right then and there it should have been enough to know something more was wrong then being in heat. Maybe we could have saved her had we acted then. That night, she seemed to be feeling better and playing with a new toy, and would flop her head on the ground sideways and show me her teeth to tell me she was wanting to play, which I did a little bit with her as she laid in her bed beside me. That's why I never expected what I'd find the next morning.
Last night I had my window open in my bedroom. My door is the only one in the house that won't latch because it's broke, so she knew she could push the door open and come in my room and lay down, as she often did. With the window open it was windy, and so the door kept starting to make noise that it was opening. I kept catching myself thinking my girl was coming in the room to visit. After about 20 minutes of that torture I closed the window so it would stop.
Thanks again to everybody for words of support.
Critterhunter
New member
Shaqdue, I thank you for your support.
OK, this might be a little presumptuous to some, but I'm going to post a private reply I gave to somebody (with their identity stripped to keep them anonymous). I realize this can be taken the wrong way, as a public display of affliction, but believe me it's not intended as that. Rather, I post this to hope others realize what it took me many years and many bumps in the road in terms of personal losses to realize. So, for that reason, I post it...Only to try to help others wake up and realize what they have before they lose it, human, animal, or otherwise. If you want to feel I'm being dramatic by doing this then I can't argue with that, as in another state of mind I probably would feel the same way. Still, the benefits to the possible few outweigh the smirks of even much more others in my mind, so I'll let it ride. My private, though sanitize for anonymity, response is as follows...
Thank you very much. Your words have more weight at this point in time than you probably even know. This dog has touched me in ways that I could never verbalize. At this point in time, without a wife or kids, my "world" is very small. Sure, I have family, but as much as I love them they can't take the place of a good dog, or a loving wife or kids.
Not that you love one or the other more, but it's that you love each in very different ways. Sky was very "unique" to me in how I felt for her, and so the loss in some ways is even more devastating than even the loss of my farther. Again, not more, but in different ways. In some of those ways a dog can even touch you more deeply to the core of the soul. More importantly? Perhaps not, but more deeply in certain ways. I have never felt such loss for a death. Even when my dad passed away at 18 it wasn't the "same".
Now, partly I attribute that to me being less mature in those young punk days, and thus less appreciative of my father and the impact of his passing, but just the same there is a "purity" or "innocence" of a special dog that just can't be nailed downed in terms of it's emotional impact. Dogs are Innocent, and with unconditional love. As much as I loved my dad, even at my younger state of "punkness", there is just a very extra sad quality to the loss of my Sky that I can't even verbalize.
I will tell you this...As much as you appreciate your dog, and as much as you do for her, you WILL feel god forbid after her passing that you didn't do enough. As much as I knew and did better with Sky, after growing older and losing the love of my life (a girlfriend) due to my younger in-experienced days, I can tell you that you will still feel you didn't appreciate and do enough for that beautiful soul, dog or human.
So, my friend, I'm going to tell you right now...On those days you think twice about taking your beloved dog on a car ride, or to a hunt with you, or even taking her for a walk around the block...Don't think twice and decide not to. Instead, don't look at it on those odd days as a burden, but rather as a beautiful gift, and enjoy the time you have with him or her. I did a better job at that with Sky, but even still I sit, stew, and wonder, about how much better I could have made her life, and my life with her...
Life, I'm coming more to realize in the last few days, not that I didn't learn this lesson when I lost the love of my life (a girlfriend years prior), is not so much about what money you make or the things you have. Really, all that stuff feels rather empty, especially when the few loved ones (human or dog) are ripped away from you. Rather, it's all about those "souls" you REALLY have feelings for around you, and that includes the special souls of pets as well. Nothing else, simply put, really matters in life.
You aren't going to be on your death bed complaining about the extra time you should have spent at the office, or the extra money you could have made. Instead, you'll be thinking back to the "soul" connections with other living beings (dog or human or otherwise), and if you have any regrets it will be that you didn't express and "feel" how much you cared and loved for those souls. Nothing else matters. Period.
And, hopefully, you'll have treated those "souls" with enough love and care to not have many regrets in how you treated them. Sure, despite your best efforts at being "enlightened", you'll still feel you didn't do enough. But, in the back of your mind, you'll know you did more than you would have years ago when you were younger and less wiser. That is the thing to hold on to, as nobody ever is going to feel they did enough.
I feel in many ways I should have done more with Sky, but in the back of my head I know that 20 years ago I wouldn't have loved her nearly as much or spent time with her as much as I did when we met. I hold onto that as a blanket, and let it fight off the despair and loneliness that creeps into my soul at night when the sadness comes calling. I hope the same resolve can find others as well in their loss, human or not, as it's the only thing that keeps me from crumbling up into a small ball and sinking away...
Maybe or probably not tonight, I'll be posting a message about what to look for in terms of your dogs or even loved ones, in terms of what odd "in the back of your mind" behaviour they exhibit that is somehow different than just the normal "under the weather" behavior they will have. I only feel that if I would have listened to my "gut", or "the back of my head", I would have saw that Sky was not just going through her normally mopey behavior of being in heat. If I had picked up on those signs, a week or so in advance, I feel she might have been saved. Be perceptive of those "odd" things, in your human or animals friends, and don't let your "forward" mind excuse what the "back" of your mind is telling you. Had I done that, things might have been different. I know I'll be VERY aware of those things with future incidents, human or dog...
OK, this might be a little presumptuous to some, but I'm going to post a private reply I gave to somebody (with their identity stripped to keep them anonymous). I realize this can be taken the wrong way, as a public display of affliction, but believe me it's not intended as that. Rather, I post this to hope others realize what it took me many years and many bumps in the road in terms of personal losses to realize. So, for that reason, I post it...Only to try to help others wake up and realize what they have before they lose it, human, animal, or otherwise. If you want to feel I'm being dramatic by doing this then I can't argue with that, as in another state of mind I probably would feel the same way. Still, the benefits to the possible few outweigh the smirks of even much more others in my mind, so I'll let it ride. My private, though sanitize for anonymity, response is as follows...
Thank you very much. Your words have more weight at this point in time than you probably even know. This dog has touched me in ways that I could never verbalize. At this point in time, without a wife or kids, my "world" is very small. Sure, I have family, but as much as I love them they can't take the place of a good dog, or a loving wife or kids.
Not that you love one or the other more, but it's that you love each in very different ways. Sky was very "unique" to me in how I felt for her, and so the loss in some ways is even more devastating than even the loss of my farther. Again, not more, but in different ways. In some of those ways a dog can even touch you more deeply to the core of the soul. More importantly? Perhaps not, but more deeply in certain ways. I have never felt such loss for a death. Even when my dad passed away at 18 it wasn't the "same".
Now, partly I attribute that to me being less mature in those young punk days, and thus less appreciative of my father and the impact of his passing, but just the same there is a "purity" or "innocence" of a special dog that just can't be nailed downed in terms of it's emotional impact. Dogs are Innocent, and with unconditional love. As much as I loved my dad, even at my younger state of "punkness", there is just a very extra sad quality to the loss of my Sky that I can't even verbalize.
I will tell you this...As much as you appreciate your dog, and as much as you do for her, you WILL feel god forbid after her passing that you didn't do enough. As much as I knew and did better with Sky, after growing older and losing the love of my life (a girlfriend) due to my younger in-experienced days, I can tell you that you will still feel you didn't appreciate and do enough for that beautiful soul, dog or human.
So, my friend, I'm going to tell you right now...On those days you think twice about taking your beloved dog on a car ride, or to a hunt with you, or even taking her for a walk around the block...Don't think twice and decide not to. Instead, don't look at it on those odd days as a burden, but rather as a beautiful gift, and enjoy the time you have with him or her. I did a better job at that with Sky, but even still I sit, stew, and wonder, about how much better I could have made her life, and my life with her...
Life, I'm coming more to realize in the last few days, not that I didn't learn this lesson when I lost the love of my life (a girlfriend years prior), is not so much about what money you make or the things you have. Really, all that stuff feels rather empty, especially when the few loved ones (human or dog) are ripped away from you. Rather, it's all about those "souls" you REALLY have feelings for around you, and that includes the special souls of pets as well. Nothing else, simply put, really matters in life.
You aren't going to be on your death bed complaining about the extra time you should have spent at the office, or the extra money you could have made. Instead, you'll be thinking back to the "soul" connections with other living beings (dog or human or otherwise), and if you have any regrets it will be that you didn't express and "feel" how much you cared and loved for those souls. Nothing else matters. Period.
And, hopefully, you'll have treated those "souls" with enough love and care to not have many regrets in how you treated them. Sure, despite your best efforts at being "enlightened", you'll still feel you didn't do enough. But, in the back of your mind, you'll know you did more than you would have years ago when you were younger and less wiser. That is the thing to hold on to, as nobody ever is going to feel they did enough.
I feel in many ways I should have done more with Sky, but in the back of my head I know that 20 years ago I wouldn't have loved her nearly as much or spent time with her as much as I did when we met. I hold onto that as a blanket, and let it fight off the despair and loneliness that creeps into my soul at night when the sadness comes calling. I hope the same resolve can find others as well in their loss, human or not, as it's the only thing that keeps me from crumbling up into a small ball and sinking away...
Maybe or probably not tonight, I'll be posting a message about what to look for in terms of your dogs or even loved ones, in terms of what odd "in the back of your mind" behaviour they exhibit that is somehow different than just the normal "under the weather" behavior they will have. I only feel that if I would have listened to my "gut", or "the back of my head", I would have saw that Sky was not just going through her normally mopey behavior of being in heat. If I had picked up on those signs, a week or so in advance, I feel she might have been saved. Be perceptive of those "odd" things, in your human or animals friends, and don't let your "forward" mind excuse what the "back" of your mind is telling you. Had I done that, things might have been different. I know I'll be VERY aware of those things with future incidents, human or dog...
I'm sorry for your lost critter, I lost My best friend too, Russy was his name, it was run over by a truck that was speeding on the street but the driver was caught 2 blocks away and got a BIG FINE and jail time because it was DUI and with suspended license.
it was hard for my girls too.
We feel your lost!
Abel and Family.
it was hard for my girls too.
We feel your lost!
Abel and Family.
Critterhunter
New member
Thank you, and I'm very sorry for your loss as well.
I've got a QUICK little story about my neighbor's dog. I visit my neighbor almost every day, and roughly about once or maybe twice a weak her Rottweiler & Black Lab mix will flop on the floor next to me, put it's feet in the air, and grrrr at me to pay attention to and pet it. Anyway, EVERY day I've been over there since Sky died, this dog is doing this to me, and not just once, but two or three times during my visit each time. Now, you tell me that dogs don't know more things then we give them credit for. This dog can sense that Sky is gone and that I'm sad, and she's doing her best to comfort me. I find that touching and a miracle. Dogs are special souls for sure...
I've got a QUICK little story about my neighbor's dog. I visit my neighbor almost every day, and roughly about once or maybe twice a weak her Rottweiler & Black Lab mix will flop on the floor next to me, put it's feet in the air, and grrrr at me to pay attention to and pet it. Anyway, EVERY day I've been over there since Sky died, this dog is doing this to me, and not just once, but two or three times during my visit each time. Now, you tell me that dogs don't know more things then we give them credit for. This dog can sense that Sky is gone and that I'm sad, and she's doing her best to comfort me. I find that touching and a miracle. Dogs are special souls for sure...
jamesinwesttexas
New member
You know, while we're on the subject, and I may be getting off the subject, but having a dog and a horse later in life has made me more aware of how little regard we humans have for most animals and that we would do ourselves a favor by treating them better. Many of them show more feeling and empathy than many humans. It's very arrogant of us to think that they are just there for our enjoyment and disposal. I think of the cats and dogs in the kill shelters, the horses that are shipped by a very cruel process to Mexico for slaughter, modern meat factories that have no regard for the well being of those animals, the injuring of animals on our roadways, cruel processes of trapping and hunting. I could go on. Not that I would not hunt if I had too. And I sometimes eat red meat. I'm just saying that we could manage in more merciful ways that do not cause so much suffering.
Ytcoinshooter
Well-known member
Critter, I'm really sorry about your pal. That really is a loss, they treat us better than most most people do, and for so little consideration. I held one of my pets when they were administered the goodbye shot after being with me 23 years, my cat Kaz that came when I called him, like French fries and would snatch from my mouth with a nuzzle and a purr. We fed with an eyedropper when he was booted out of the litter shortly after birth.
My dog April is only 7 and I couldn't imagine losing her.
My dog April is only 7 and I couldn't imagine losing her.