Returning found rings...what do you expect in return?

[Bayoutalker]

I haven't found my first ring yet and after reading this thread I am wondering what I will do when it happens. I would like to think I would do the right thing and return it to the rightful owner but now I am not sure. All I would request from someone would be for them to be honestly grateful and show it by saying "Thank You". I really don't think that would be asking too much. It would really upset me if some of the above stories happened instead.

These types of experiences are becoming more common these days as people are becoming more "takers" than "givers". In my childhood we were taught to be responsible for ourselves and our deeds and to be respecful of others. These days it is "expected" that other people accept responsibility for the things we do and we therefore don't have to accept it for ourselves. I sure would like to see it change back.

 

[khouse]

Just hold some doors open for people and see how many "thank yous" you get.....

 

[jabbo]

n/t

 

[kcdigit]

At least some gratitude.

 

[7centsworth]

That is what is wrong with the world today , we always expect something in return . I have got burned hundreds of times in my life but that does not keep me from doing the right thing. I once returned a ring and the man cryed he was so happy he had had a rough week and that truly made his day. You may get dissapointed alot of times. But there is always those honest, good people like you that would truly be grateful that someone returned your ring. I think about that one commercial were someone helps a person and others see it and then they help someone. You may get burned a few times but you will be blessed some too.

 

[Mtnmn]

After reading all these stories, I'm glad all I expect from someone is a "thanks" for a favor done. Though I'm not above asking if it would be possible to metal detect their property in lieu of any cash offered.

 

[SnoopDawg]

These type stories of ring-returns with no finders tip, and sometimes not even a thankyou, are not un-common. But you guys have to realize, that in that person's mind, the ring is THEIR'S, not YOURS, so .... why should they be obliged to "give you something", when it's just rightfully theirs, to begin with?

I'm just getting into this and doing a lot of research on the time and money spent on this. Wow, that a great thing you guys are doing and after reading the above quote on how some people may feel, ( I realize this isn't the commenters view ) I had to comment regarding those people. They can feel how they however they like and I don't think anything can justify that type of behavior no matter if they owned it or not. Laws, the obligation to do the right thing or whatever is irrelevant. You guys spend your money and time to do this and you re good enough to go out of your way to find the owner? The law doesn't say you have to do that and even if it so what. If you do that for them and they wont at least pay for postage, they didn't deserve to have it back in the first place. That's just a major character flaw of the owner and doing that to someone that returned their item ruins it for others that lose things as you may be discouraged to return anymore items to their owners.

This reminds me of a situation I was in at ultra music festival on South beach when my patella was dislocated. I ended up in an ambulance ride to the hospital. Well my knee popped out again in the ambulance ride and i was screaming in pain. the paramedic did nothing and my girlfriend had to pop it back in. I just figured he was too busy staring at her, but found out later that sometimes when they have offered assistance in that manner and something goes wrong the injured person brings a law suit against them.Who does that and can live with themselves?

Im sorry, but if someone is doing something for you by going out of their way, then at least offer a reward, pay for postage or something. I mean who acts like this? I saw one post here saying, what should you do if that happens. My answer is to say something, I know I may be a bit harsh here but Id say wow, you're not even going to cover my postage? Really? And for the guy that told the hunter that found his item, that he will call the police if he didnt return it ( when he had called to return it in the first place ) Id of taken the item back to the place i found it and left it there. Then maybe be so kind to let the owner know of a good Detector to get for a $1000 and some tutorial videos on how to find his item. This way he can save paying me the postage!

People need to learn how to act. Sorry but this really grinds my gears, lol Kudos for what you guys are doing, dont know If I would do the same.

 

[SnoopDawg]

 

[Furious T]

I think it's sometimes important to remember that not all rings and jewellery that we find has been lost (accidentally). For their own (private) reasons, some people may not be glad or grateful when they get a call saying that something has been found.
Like most others, I've also had mixed reactions when I've returned rings, and it does leave a sour taste in the mouth sometimes.

I guess the best we can do is obey the laws of our particular County, State or Country, and follow our own conscience.

I dont believe that the finder of something has the obligation to go to any expense to return it, so long as laws are obeyed (referring to the incidents when police were involved). I think that contacting the owner is sufficient, then it is up to them to agree to or arrange to have the article returned....the finder, where I live, legally has no further obligation than report the article found. This might involve handing it in at the local police station, but for this obligation to apply (where I live) there must be a reasonable belief in the mind of the finder that the owner can be found. (The "reasonable man" test).

Charging for our services to find stuff is an honest and reasonable option, I believe. Our time is important to us, and we expect to pay if we call in a plumber or electrician. Again, this is something for each of us to make out own decisions about.
The important thing for me is to enjoy my hobby, and not let the beliefs/personalities/character flaws of others ruin my enjoyment.

 

[Steve(MS)]

and really wanted to return a HS class ring.
I called the the HS right?...got the principal, he transferred me to main office.
I talked to a moronic woman and gave her the year and initials.
Asked if she would look up the name so I could find individual.
This woman first mumbled some and said the records weren't in office.
My impression is the she thought I was just using this to contact someone for some devious reason.
Told me she would call me back...never got a phone call from the school.
I could tell by talking to the principal and office lady this wasn't going to end the way I wanted it.
I wonder if someone had told the office workers not to give out personal information such as someone's name.

I have a low threshold for stupidity.
This is a girl's ring so there is a good possibility she now has a different last name.

There are no records for this school on the internet at least for free looking.
I am not sure even if I were to pay for one of those sites....
This is a small town in no-where-land.
I have no clue what her name is.
This happened several years back.
I didn't find the ring at the school, it was at another site some 20 miles away.
This should have been an easy thing for the school office to do.
I am sorry not being able to return the woman's lost ring but I ain't no private investigator.
Pizzed me off about the whole situation.

 

[scubadetector]

Steve, its not the person's fault who lost it the school administrators are jerks. I have ran into that over and over and over. The BEST person to contact it seems is the school librarian. They have access to all the yearbooks. I keep trying on rings and one school I called a whole lot of times before I found somebody that cared. The University of Maryland was a joke for example. I was accused of trying to get money from an alumni. I called over and over and finally was told 3 different names. The very first one I called, a woman answered and after I told her what I found she said, you found it in XXXX lake! It was lost in 1954 and her boyfriend who is still her husband lost it swimming. It was her engagement ring cause they had no money. If your interested you can see the story here:



Click on picture for video.

For any interested , zabasearch.com is a great way to attempt to find people. I REALLY do feel the good you get out of returning a ring is FAR better than keeping them. I told my horor stories BUT have had FANTASTIC results also and have been invited to private beaches, private lakes, and a LOT of marina's know me and other people which allows me access to a lot more water than ALL the other detectorists in Michigan.

To each their own. We all need to do what we feel is best. All those rings in the video were returned except for the class ring of 1901. No way would I ever find an owner for that one.

 

[bob.oz]

Wow!!..this post really took off...good stories and info to ponder.
Great video SD...thanks..I used Zabba on my first class ring thanks to your advice,and although none of the ph# were any good it gave me a possible location of the looser. I then posted on Craig's list in that town and others around, in the lost and found..LOOKING FOR...John doe...it worked.It also put me in touch with a lady that was a "Skip chaser" for several years,a skip chaser tracks down people that owe money.She is more than willing to help out anyone on this forum.PM me if you want her email...Also,the ring maker can help out if the ring is newer,they keep contact info for several years.These days nobody is going to give you the contact info ,but they will contact them and relay your number,that's how Jostens helped me,as well as a beach resort that a ring was found at.
Class rings are still going to be my least favorite ring to find..LOL...and heck,i might just keep them a little longer till i get tired of looking at them.
BY the way...I emailed the three people that did not acknowledge that they got the rings i sent back....all i said was.... happy Thanksgiving and this post ....GL HH

 

[Teri]

Having found and returned a few items (two purses, a wallet, credit cards, a checkbook) in my lifetime, I found great pleasure in getting the items back to their rightful owners even after spending my time locating them and at my own expense. I never wanted or expected anything in return except that good feeling in my heart that told me I made someones day. It really didn't even bother me to spend the postage when necessary. When I contacted the woman about her lost checkbook I thought that she might offer me a reward (which I wouldn't accept) since she had just made a $15,000.00 deposit in the account a few days prior. I drove to the mall to meet her halfway and although she thanked me, she didn't show the kind of appreciation that I would have given someone for making such an effort. That won't stop me, though. I have assisted the writer of this thread in locating a few owners of rings and want nothing in return except to hear that the owner was thankful for their return. After reading these many comments I wonder if you should contact the owner and advise them that you had found the item and added it to your collection of pieces to have melted down for cash. Advise them that If they are interested in it's return to send the postage immediately and that if you don't hear from them you will assume that they are not interested in it's return. If you don't hear from them in a reasonable time, you could contact them again and let them know you are taking your found objects in for melt down. People shouldn't ask you if you want a reward. They should send you one out of gratitude. That seems to be rare these days. The few that do will make it all worthwhile. Happy hunting, and returning.

 

[greggel]

I also belong to theringfinders.com and have contracts to hand out but in the 3 years that I have belonged to the network I have never had to use one. I ask for auto expense depending how far I have to go and if a reward is offered, I take it. I have only been stiffed once in 3 years by a girl who lost her engagement ring at Oval beach in Saugatuck, MI. I drove 45 miles there on a Saturday night and searched, went back the next day and the next day. She said she would send me $25.00 for gas and never sent it. The kicker is that she worked at Spectrum Health Butterworth Hospital in Grand Rapids and I had just retired from Spectrum Health so we had a link.
I never ask for a reward but have always been given one.

 

[Wisconsin]

Expect nothing!

Give it to the cops and put in a claim if it's not returned to lawful owner at their expense and time then it is yours to keep. IT THE LAW use it!

 

[scubadetector]

Expect nothing!

Give it to the cops and put in a claim if it's not returned to lawful owner at their expense and time then it is yours to keep. IT THE LAW use it!

 

[bob.oz]

SD...I can't stop laughing.......You got to at least give a little history...like u were a cop,and this posting of yours

http://www.findmall.com/read.php?26,1717742

 

[Wetdogg72]

I dont know if its been mentioned but if you know the school and its town you could probably find a facebook page and go from there.. I havent found so havent returned any rings, but I would assume that at least some gratitude would be acknowledged. I would take a reward if offered tho.. or maybe not, depends on what it is and who the person is. If its some person in bad health and broke then no way.. it would be at my discretion I guess..

 

[mickfin]

Bob if i find a Class Ring, I want too returne one some Day Somtimes a reward????? But most always a reward of seeing the owner smile N getting Happy, It would be a good thing 4R us too do, But at the same time im wearing a Gold Ring that fits me never found a Diamond Ring that fits me N i wear it Proud $1800.00 Proud, Go to Finds Mall on the main Whites forum see my Ring, Mickfin
Only a Name is inside to go on and it was 4" Deep so its a long shot to find the owner????? But if it was a Class Ring with more Info i would try, On a Class Ring ask the people what the Name is on the inside of the Ring be4R you give it Back so you know it thears????
It gives are Hobby a good repor, But thats up to the Finder?????? Its what you fee Bob, Mickfin

 

[Elton]

I have come to the conclusion after a lot of soul searching for my true feelings.. We should expect nothing more than a "Thank You"

In most instances we were not asked to find the lost items..we just stumbled upon them doing our hobby.........

To expect payment would be out of line... To expect a thank you would be appropriate in most circumstances.........

Should a reward be offered that will be up to each of us to decide if we will, or will not accept it. Most of the time, "to do what each of us feel is the right thing", is enough.

Only "YOU" can decide what your willing/want to do in returning items.. There really is no right or wrong..... [size=x-large]Let your conscious be your guide !![/size]