charlie (ky)
New member
As the New Year approaches, here are a few points to ponder:
10. Life is sexually transmitted.
9. Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
8. Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If he doesn't have that look in his eye, fix him a sandwich.
7. Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use
the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
6. Some people are like a Slinky ... not really good for anything, but you
still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
5. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of
nothing.
4. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to
criticism.
3. Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200 and a substantial tax cut
saves you 30 cents?
2. In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006: We know exactly where one cow with
mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in
America but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal
immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department
of Agriculture in charge of immigration.
10. Life is sexually transmitted.
9. Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
8. Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If he doesn't have that look in his eye, fix him a sandwich.
7. Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day; teach a person to use
the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks.
6. Some people are like a Slinky ... not really good for anything, but you
still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.
5. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of
nothing.
4. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to
criticism.
3. Why does a slight tax increase cost you $200 and a substantial tax cut
saves you 30 cents?
2. In the 60s, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is
weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
AND THE NUMBER 1 THOUGHT FOR 2006: We know exactly where one cow with
mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in
America but we haven't got a clue as to where thousands of illegal
immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department
of Agriculture in charge of immigration.