Now my Mates on the 'Beach and Waterhunting Forum' know me as the Bermuda Pirate working the surf here and finding gold and silver but what they don't know is that my pirate nature started at an early age.
Like all parents, mine packed me off to kindergarten at the ripe old age of 5 years old (5 1/2 actually, back then you still counted 1/2's and even 1/4's)
. I was a good little student, how hard can fingerpainting and building blocks be?, but I was a little headstrong and independent according to my report cards. I liked most of the other tikes in my kindergarten class and especially Miss Swain who was a real hotty with a beehive hairdoo, Jackie O suits and kewl jewllery.
It took me a little while to figure out that Miss Swain was a little too old for a young lad of my tender years and I was crushed when her boyfriend dropped in on our class one day. What did he have that I didn't have I thought.
Fortunately for me there was a cute little girl with the bluest eyes and the sweetest dimples who felt the same way about me as I felt about Miss Swain, Cindy Walker. It didn't take me long to switch my attentions to Cindy, especially after Miss Swain had rejected my heartfelt affections.
Cindy and I would chat and share our games and toys at play time and at nap time we always wound up close to each other so we could flirt with each other while the other kids slept.
Now the highlight of the day was 'Story Time' and all the kids would sit in a circle while Miss Swain read us a story (they were usually a little tame because they were school cirriculum approved but it was good just the same). While sitting cross-legged at story time and it wasn't a particularly interesting story (no dragons or pirates and such)
so Cindy and I got to chatting and flirting. Miss Swain stopped reading the story and told us to ssshhhh!, so we did for a little while. Now Cindy was a real sweety so she reached over and tickled me after Miss Swain had started reading again. I laughed and tickled her back which made her giggle, Miss Swain put down the book and said in a stern voice "If you two misbehave one more time I will have to put you in the corner!". Miss Swain was so cute when she was angry but I was a little confused about what 'in the corner meant'?? I was familiar with getting the switch or my hand slapped but 'being put in the corner' was a foreign concept to me. Cindy seemed thoroughly chastened by this threat though so I assumed it must be something pretty bad.
Miss Swain went back to the story and I leaned over to Cindy to tell her that she shouldn't have tickled me cause we were now in trouble and Cindy stuck her tongue out at me so I stuck my tongue out at her. Cindy gave me a little shove for my being rude and that was it, Miss Swain closed up the book and ordered Cindy to go stand in the corner. Well Cindy started balling her eyes out which made me feel pretty bad and slunk over to the corner that Miss Swain was indicating with her finger, where she stood and sobbed. Miss Swain then ordered me to go stand in the opposite corner. From the way Cindy was acting I figured that this was just the beginning of the punishment and it was going to get pretty ugly so I was having none of this, "NO!" I said.
Miss Swain looked rather confused by my defiant response and ordered me into the corner, yet again and pointed her finger at me and then at the corner. (suddenly Miss Swain didn't look so cute
)
I said very calmly but firmly "No, I will not".
Miss Swain put the storybook down on floor, got up from her chair and tottered over to me on her high heels, the Jackie 'O' suit she was wearing made walking even more difficult. I could tell she meant business and our previous (onesided) relationship was not going to stay her hand. She bent over to grab me by the shoulders and physically usher me into the corner and her large blue plastic beads swung down into my face. I was having none of this so I grabbed the beads to squirm out of her grasp and the string holding them together snapped!
Man Oh Man! There were blue plastic beads flying all over the place and the other kids broke from the circle to grab them up, Miss Swain staggered back and almost fell over a couple of kindergarteners who were crawling behind her picking up the scattering beads.
Oh, Oh! she cried out grasping at the few remaining beads on her necklace.
By the shocked look on Miss Swain's face I could tell that I was deep in the sh-t now and it immediately occurred to me that now would be a good time to leave. 'Home would be a safe place to be' I thought, so I leapt to me tiny feet and bolted for the classroom door.
"ERIC! Come Back Here!" Miss Swain screeched. I don't know what possessed me but I spun around in the doorway and shook my finger at her and said "You're Not Going to Catch Me!".
I spun on my heel and sprinted up the hallway to the main exit and freedom.
Like all parents, mine packed me off to kindergarten at the ripe old age of 5 years old (5 1/2 actually, back then you still counted 1/2's and even 1/4's)
. I was a good little student, how hard can fingerpainting and building blocks be?, but I was a little headstrong and independent according to my report cards. I liked most of the other tikes in my kindergarten class and especially Miss Swain who was a real hotty with a beehive hairdoo, Jackie O suits and kewl jewllery. It took me a little while to figure out that Miss Swain was a little too old for a young lad of my tender years and I was crushed when her boyfriend dropped in on our class one day. What did he have that I didn't have I thought.Fortunately for me there was a cute little girl with the bluest eyes and the sweetest dimples who felt the same way about me as I felt about Miss Swain, Cindy Walker. It didn't take me long to switch my attentions to Cindy, especially after Miss Swain had rejected my heartfelt affections.
Cindy and I would chat and share our games and toys at play time and at nap time we always wound up close to each other so we could flirt with each other while the other kids slept.Now the highlight of the day was 'Story Time' and all the kids would sit in a circle while Miss Swain read us a story (they were usually a little tame because they were school cirriculum approved but it was good just the same). While sitting cross-legged at story time and it wasn't a particularly interesting story (no dragons or pirates and such)
so Cindy and I got to chatting and flirting. Miss Swain stopped reading the story and told us to ssshhhh!, so we did for a little while. Now Cindy was a real sweety so she reached over and tickled me after Miss Swain had started reading again. I laughed and tickled her back which made her giggle, Miss Swain put down the book and said in a stern voice "If you two misbehave one more time I will have to put you in the corner!". Miss Swain was so cute when she was angry but I was a little confused about what 'in the corner meant'?? I was familiar with getting the switch or my hand slapped but 'being put in the corner' was a foreign concept to me. Cindy seemed thoroughly chastened by this threat though so I assumed it must be something pretty bad.Miss Swain went back to the story and I leaned over to Cindy to tell her that she shouldn't have tickled me cause we were now in trouble and Cindy stuck her tongue out at me so I stuck my tongue out at her. Cindy gave me a little shove for my being rude and that was it, Miss Swain closed up the book and ordered Cindy to go stand in the corner. Well Cindy started balling her eyes out which made me feel pretty bad and slunk over to the corner that Miss Swain was indicating with her finger, where she stood and sobbed. Miss Swain then ordered me to go stand in the opposite corner. From the way Cindy was acting I figured that this was just the beginning of the punishment and it was going to get pretty ugly so I was having none of this, "NO!" I said.
Miss Swain looked rather confused by my defiant response and ordered me into the corner, yet again and pointed her finger at me and then at the corner. (suddenly Miss Swain didn't look so cute
)I said very calmly but firmly "No, I will not".
Miss Swain put the storybook down on floor, got up from her chair and tottered over to me on her high heels, the Jackie 'O' suit she was wearing made walking even more difficult. I could tell she meant business and our previous (onesided) relationship was not going to stay her hand. She bent over to grab me by the shoulders and physically usher me into the corner and her large blue plastic beads swung down into my face. I was having none of this so I grabbed the beads to squirm out of her grasp and the string holding them together snapped!
Man Oh Man! There were blue plastic beads flying all over the place and the other kids broke from the circle to grab them up, Miss Swain staggered back and almost fell over a couple of kindergarteners who were crawling behind her picking up the scattering beads.
Oh, Oh! she cried out grasping at the few remaining beads on her necklace.
By the shocked look on Miss Swain's face I could tell that I was deep in the sh-t now and it immediately occurred to me that now would be a good time to leave. 'Home would be a safe place to be' I thought, so I leapt to me tiny feet and bolted for the classroom door.
"ERIC! Come Back Here!" Miss Swain screeched. I don't know what possessed me but I spun around in the doorway and shook my finger at her and said "You're Not Going to Catch Me!".
I spun on my heel and sprinted up the hallway to the main exit and freedom.
