Wayne in BC
New member
I wasn't going to post this cause there are some peeps who are a tad "delicate" ..what the heck, its my life and if they don't like it so be it
Early this morning, coffee is just poured, i sit down by the window to read a bit of of the forum.
Corner of my eye starts nagging, used to the Deer, cats and hens ( which i thankfully had not turned out yet) strolling past the window but this is way to big and black!
Turn my head 30 deg and get an instant eyeful of 350 lbs of solid black "what can i help myself to around here?". Now i never exaggerate weights on critters and prefer to weigh in on the side of caution from too many years of hearing bullsh#t and what's the point.
Well i am used to seeing frigging bears, they poke their noses outta the bush often enough and are 98% easy to scare the shat out of as they snoop an area. On my patio and 15 ft away is a whole nother game and i am instantly mad as hell! :veryangry: I have had way more than enough troubles with varmints this year, i feel like Elmer Fudd for chripesakes!
Glad herself is sleeping as my apex predator brain runs several end scenarios, mostly gory ones through a fog of pure p#ssed off!
Arrogant bast#rd! Obviously too may liberal peeps have enabled this azzhole, ya lets make it political, no guilt anyway but extra "mad" is good if i keep it cool. I know i got time to plan in this case. First thought is not the biggest gun in the house like it would have been back in the day cause getting rid of that much trash and cleaning up the patio and numerous collateral damages to planters, furniture, pond, etc ain't a reasoned approach, not to mention the revenge factor lurking in my anger.
First thought is, how much fire can i get going in his frigging hide with the flare gun? Dang! the woods are dry and a trail of fire gonna get us all barbecued, crap!
A handful of fire crackers? Nah, not unless i could get em stuck in his fur.
Back to the good old .22, and i ease open the patio door, holding my very accurate Mossberg with the good 4x scope and the Model-94 30.30 set in close reach.
A few steps and peak around the corner to see him now 30 ft away and nose down exploring a bag of chicken manure by the garden fence. He is focused, rest the rifle on a planter and i put the sight on the tip of his big black nose, thinking to crease it, then a thought.......switch to his azz, searching for a nut sack, yep........crack!
Now there are some who need to just ignore this and quit reading if they have a problem with hysterical laughter and a black azzhole bear spinning in circles bawling then heading for the next province at warp speed, should be going by Mike's place any time now..........
I can't believe i got so lucky to get that sight picture and i feel a bunch better knowing that this arrogant booger won't be breeding
PLUS, my wife is safer in the yard in her slow cumbersome scooter, a few nights back she was sitting on the patio after dark and this sucker came up several feet from her, snuffling and carrying on, no more!
Early this morning, coffee is just poured, i sit down by the window to read a bit of of the forum.
Corner of my eye starts nagging, used to the Deer, cats and hens ( which i thankfully had not turned out yet) strolling past the window but this is way to big and black!
Turn my head 30 deg and get an instant eyeful of 350 lbs of solid black "what can i help myself to around here?". Now i never exaggerate weights on critters and prefer to weigh in on the side of caution from too many years of hearing bullsh#t and what's the point.
Well i am used to seeing frigging bears, they poke their noses outta the bush often enough and are 98% easy to scare the shat out of as they snoop an area. On my patio and 15 ft away is a whole nother game and i am instantly mad as hell! :veryangry: I have had way more than enough troubles with varmints this year, i feel like Elmer Fudd for chripesakes!
Glad herself is sleeping as my apex predator brain runs several end scenarios, mostly gory ones through a fog of pure p#ssed off!
Arrogant bast#rd! Obviously too may liberal peeps have enabled this azzhole, ya lets make it political, no guilt anyway but extra "mad" is good if i keep it cool. I know i got time to plan in this case. First thought is not the biggest gun in the house like it would have been back in the day cause getting rid of that much trash and cleaning up the patio and numerous collateral damages to planters, furniture, pond, etc ain't a reasoned approach, not to mention the revenge factor lurking in my anger.
First thought is, how much fire can i get going in his frigging hide with the flare gun? Dang! the woods are dry and a trail of fire gonna get us all barbecued, crap!
A handful of fire crackers? Nah, not unless i could get em stuck in his fur.
Back to the good old .22, and i ease open the patio door, holding my very accurate Mossberg with the good 4x scope and the Model-94 30.30 set in close reach.
A few steps and peak around the corner to see him now 30 ft away and nose down exploring a bag of chicken manure by the garden fence. He is focused, rest the rifle on a planter and i put the sight on the tip of his big black nose, thinking to crease it, then a thought.......switch to his azz, searching for a nut sack, yep........crack!
Now there are some who need to just ignore this and quit reading if they have a problem with hysterical laughter and a black azzhole bear spinning in circles bawling then heading for the next province at warp speed, should be going by Mike's place any time now..........
I can't believe i got so lucky to get that sight picture and i feel a bunch better knowing that this arrogant booger won't be breedingPLUS, my wife is safer in the yard in her slow cumbersome scooter, a few nights back she was sitting on the patio after dark and this sucker came up several feet from her, snuffling and carrying on, no more!
