Ever Preach to one of those Arkansas Bears Arkie? Don't forget to water them first!! 
:
A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a Rabbi all served as chaplains
to the students of Northern Michigan University in Marquette. They
would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk
shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't
really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear.
One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment
They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and
attempt to convert it.
Seven days later, they're all together to discuss the experience.
Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and
has various bandages, goes first."Well," he says, "I went into the
woods to find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him
from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and
began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water,
sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle a
lamb. The bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion
and confirmation."
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an
arm and both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and
brimstone oratory he claimed, " WELL brothers, you KNOW that we
don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began
to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted
nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to
wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another
until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his
hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb.
We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."
They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital
bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IV's and monitors
running in and out of him. He was in bad shape.
The rabbi looks up and says, "Looking back on it, circumcision may
not have been the best way to start things out with my bear".
:A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a Rabbi all served as chaplains
to the students of Northern Michigan University in Marquette. They
would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk
shop.
One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't
really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear.
One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment
They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and
attempt to convert it.
Seven days later, they're all together to discuss the experience.
Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and
has various bandages, goes first."Well," he says, "I went into the
woods to find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him
from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and
began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water,
sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle a
lamb. The bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion
and confirmation."
Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an
arm and both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and
brimstone oratory he claimed, " WELL brothers, you KNOW that we
don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began
to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted
nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to
wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another
until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his
hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb.
We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."
They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital
bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IV's and monitors
running in and out of him. He was in bad shape.
The rabbi looks up and says, "Looking back on it, circumcision may
not have been the best way to start things out with my bear".