Here's a little humor. I know Royal will enjoy it! :wave:

[WillyP]

Take this with a grain of salt. Just for laughs.


My wife dresses to kill. She also cooks the same way.
-Henny Youngman
----------------------------------------------------------

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we
met.
-Rodney Dangerfield
-----------------------------------------------------------

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's
wrong.
-Milton Berle
------------------------------------------------------------

I bought my wife a new car. She called and said,
"There was
water in the carburetor."
I asked her , "Where's the car?"
She replied,"In the lake."
-Henny Youngman
--------------------------------------------------------------

The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret.
-Henny Youngman
-----------------------------------------------------------------

After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, "You
know, I
was a fool when I married you."
The husband replied, "Yes, dear, but I was in love and

didn't notice."
>------------------------------------------------------------------------

When a man steals your wife, there is no better
revenge than
to let him keep her.
>--------------------------------------------------------------

I haven't spoken to my wife in 18 months - I don't
like to
interrupt her.
>---------------------------------------------------------

My girlfriend told me I should be more affectionate.
So I
got myself two girlfriends.
---------------------------------------------------------

A man said his credit card was stolen but he decided
not to
report it since the thief was spending much less than
his wife did.
-------------------------------------------------------
----
;Man is incomplete until he is married. Then he is
finished.
----------------------------------------------------------

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does
it cost
to get married?"
The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still
paying."
----------------------------------------------------------

Young Son: Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of
Africa a
Man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?
Dad: That happens in every country, son.
---------------------------------------------------------

Then there was a man who said, "I never knew what real

happiness was until I got married; then it was too
late.
----------------------------------------------------------

A man placed an ad in the classifieds: "Wife wanted."
The next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same: "You can have mine."
--------------------------------------------------------

A woman was telling her friend, "I made my husband a
millionaire."
"And what was he before you married him?" asked the
friend.
"A billionaire." she replied,
----------------------------------------------------------

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over
intelligence.
Second marriage is the triumph of hope over
experience.
----------------------------------------------------------

It's not true that married men live longer than single
men.
It only seems longer.
----------------------------------------------------------

Losing a wife can be very hard. In my case, it was
almost
impossible.
------------------------------------------------------

Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go
through
life Thinking they had no faults at all.
----------------
-----------------------------------------
A successful man is one who makes more money than his
wife
can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such
a man.
----------------------------------------------------------

A man meets a genie. The genie tells him he can ask
for
whatever he wants,
But his mother-in-law gets double of what he gets.
The man thinks for a moment and says,"Okay, give me a
million dollarsa and beat me till I'm half dead."
---------------------------------------------------------

Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for
marriage.
They've experienced pain and bought jewellery.
----------------------------------------------------------

The most effective way to remember your wife's
birthday is
to forget it once.
----------------------------------------------------------

First guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive.



"Life is too short to be unhappy"

 

[Royal]

n/t

 

[ojm bc]

n/t

 

[Art SC]

Grow up Catholic so you fully understand guilt, avoid Jewish princesses, marry a Mormon, learn your lesson as cheaply as possible and then marry a Southern Baptist that can cook and LIKES metal detecting!

(Art Abshire, little known Cajun Comic...VERY little)

[attachment 11456 TooCajuntoCare.JPG]

 

[ojm bc]

n/t

 

[Sunny]

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[WillyP]

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[WillyP]

The jokes you read about men and women are, I think, at some point based on truth and fact. Maybe a very loose version of them but still you have to admit, at some level we identify with the jokes we read about the opposite sex.

 

[JB(MS)]

Three guys seated at the same table during a sales convention discovered they had all married at about the same time. As they discussed their relationships with their wives one of the guys said he had laid down the law right away, he told his wife, who was from Ohio, that her duties were cooking, cleaning, washing clothes, doing the dishes and keeping the yard mowed and looking pretty. He said she balked a little the first couple of days but by the third day she had accepted her role and he came home to a clean house and a great meal on the table.

The second guy, who had married a girl from Michigan and lived in an apartment, said he had done the same thing. Right after the wedding he gave his wife orders that she would also do all the cleaning, dishes and cooking and he expected to come home to a clean apartment and a well prepared meal every day. He said his wife got upset and the first day she wouldn't do anything, the dishes were unwashed, the floor needed sweeping and she was still mad. The second day he saw some improvement, she had washed the dishes. The third day he saw even more improvement, his wife did everything he had ordered her to do except for having a meal ready when he came in. The fourth day he said she accepted her role and had everything just as he had specified.

The third guy, who married a girl from Arkansas, said he told his wife basically the same as the other two guys had told their wives. His house was going to be cleaned, the cooking would be done, the laundry and dishes would be washed and it was her responsibility to get it done. He said his wife also got very mad and the first day he didn't see anything she did, the second day he still couldn't see anything she did but by the third day some of the swelling had gone down and he could see just a little out of his left eye.

 

[Sunny]

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[Sunny]

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[david(tx)]

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[david(tx)]

here's one i enjoyed

Losing a wife can be very hard. In my case, it was
almost
impossible.

 

[Wayne in BC]

[attachment 11474 Zipit.jpg]

 

[Sunny]

n/t

 

[WillyP]

n/t

 

[WillyP]

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[Wayne in BC]

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[Sunny]

n/t