<i><b>Jbird posted this story on Carl's forum in 2002. I was browsing the forum archives a little while ago, ran across it and thought I would post it here. Jbird is a super storyteller with some great and funny stories to tell, hopefully he won't mind me posting it.</b></i>
<center><hr width="90%" size="2"></center>Posted by Jbird on 9/27/2002
When I lived in Prescott Az, I got into hot competition with some other guys for the attention of this cute little 47 year old chick named Vivi. Ive always had a weakness for them younger women even though they are harder to catch. She was once a Las Vegas Chorus girl and still looked the part so competition was fierce. Unfortunately, I won her attention, not her affection, as she was a virulent man-hater. Maybe I should just say she tolerated my company now and then.
Vivi had been to college. Had degrees (or maybe it was certificates) in such useful pursuits as Yoga, Astronomy, and the use of Medicinal and aromatic herbs. Maybe some geology classes too because she believed deeply in the power of quartz crystals, had them hanging at strategic places in her house so as to concentrate the powers. She gave me a special little piece of quartz once for good luck. I lost that sucker and things have been going down hill ever since. Vivi always slept with her head pointing in a certain direction to insure the proper flow of magnetic lines of force through her body so her liver or something didnt get twisted out of shape. Must have worked because she was healthy and could bend and warp herself into weird shapes during her daily Yoga sessions.
Vivi lived in a mobile home with three cats and papa, mama, and baby Iguana Lizards. The cats would answer to voice commands. They would have nothing to do with me unless Vivi gave them permission then they were all over me. My son use to look at me from a distance wearing a blanket of cat hair and say, "I know where you been."
Vivi's idea of a night out was to build a sweat lodge and spend the night sprinkling water on hot rock to make steam. Another big night out was to climb White Spar mountain south of Prescott. The top of that little mountain was a huge slab of white quartz so you can imagine how that triggered strange impulses in Vivi. She would sit up there all night staring at the stars and waving her arms around and mumbling some kind of words. I dont know what they were but then I aint been to college. I wasnt allowed to say anything for fear of breaking some kind of spell.
Once I broke into the indian shuffle dance and started singing "He Ye Hey yo hi ya yo". Vivi got mad and went home.
Vivi climbed that little mountain once by herself which could be dangerous because of dope heads roaming that area. On the way down, she heard some one coming up the trail singing and yelling, so she hid in the woods as they passed and then said later that those zonked out dopeheads were "religious people". I asked her how she knew and she said one would yell "Hallelujah" and the other would yell "Amen". For some reason, being around Vivi made me think of George Burns wife.
Anyway, thats the background on Vivi leading up to the Extrasensory Perception stuff.
There wasnt much gold reported south of Prescott but since it was close to home, I was doing some hunting there with a metal detector. Vivi accompanied me one day and while I detected she was searching around for a special herb to cure her Iguana,s from a case of the pip and puny. All of a sudden I heard her hollering for me to come over where she was. I was a little shook up, although she had assured me that snakes would never bite her. I ran over there and Vivi was standing barefoot on that rough and rocky desert ground with her arms waving at the sky and saying "The Power, the power, dont you feel the power?" She explained that this was one of those special spots where the magnetic lines of force are much stronger than average. I always figured that her liver would quiver or something over those power spots but that's just my theory.
About that time, a guy named Harold came walking up to us and told me I shouldn't be metal detecting on someone else's claim, that I and Vivi were standing exactly in the spot where the claim owner had found a bunch of really nice nuggets. Vivi had found the "power" right exactly in the middle of what was known as the Lucky Boy nugget patch. I got Vivi out of there before that guy realized how valuable she was as a sort of bird dog for nuggets.
I couldnt convince Vivi to bird dog for me. She said she would object to me disturbing the ground in those special Power spots. I promised I would only pick up the surface nuggets but she wouldnt buy that either. Danged women. She fed old Papa Iguana some of the special herbs she found and he died, all four feet of him. Vivi was heartbroken but I couldn't help but feel she was being punished for not bird dogging nuggets for me.
Vivi got a job teaching Yoga at the local college and I went back to metal detecting and searching for power spots. Now and then, I would get a funny feeling like maybe I was standing in a special power spot loaded with nuggets but it was usually just bursitus or something in my left ankle, which is what made me remember this story of Vivi. Nice memories of a nice Lady. A little strange maybe, to some of us who aint been to college, but a nice lady and an interesting friend...........
<center><hr width="90%" size="2"></center>Posted by Jbird on 9/27/2002
When I lived in Prescott Az, I got into hot competition with some other guys for the attention of this cute little 47 year old chick named Vivi. Ive always had a weakness for them younger women even though they are harder to catch. She was once a Las Vegas Chorus girl and still looked the part so competition was fierce. Unfortunately, I won her attention, not her affection, as she was a virulent man-hater. Maybe I should just say she tolerated my company now and then.
Vivi had been to college. Had degrees (or maybe it was certificates) in such useful pursuits as Yoga, Astronomy, and the use of Medicinal and aromatic herbs. Maybe some geology classes too because she believed deeply in the power of quartz crystals, had them hanging at strategic places in her house so as to concentrate the powers. She gave me a special little piece of quartz once for good luck. I lost that sucker and things have been going down hill ever since. Vivi always slept with her head pointing in a certain direction to insure the proper flow of magnetic lines of force through her body so her liver or something didnt get twisted out of shape. Must have worked because she was healthy and could bend and warp herself into weird shapes during her daily Yoga sessions.
Vivi lived in a mobile home with three cats and papa, mama, and baby Iguana Lizards. The cats would answer to voice commands. They would have nothing to do with me unless Vivi gave them permission then they were all over me. My son use to look at me from a distance wearing a blanket of cat hair and say, "I know where you been."
Vivi's idea of a night out was to build a sweat lodge and spend the night sprinkling water on hot rock to make steam. Another big night out was to climb White Spar mountain south of Prescott. The top of that little mountain was a huge slab of white quartz so you can imagine how that triggered strange impulses in Vivi. She would sit up there all night staring at the stars and waving her arms around and mumbling some kind of words. I dont know what they were but then I aint been to college. I wasnt allowed to say anything for fear of breaking some kind of spell.
Once I broke into the indian shuffle dance and started singing "He Ye Hey yo hi ya yo". Vivi got mad and went home.
Vivi climbed that little mountain once by herself which could be dangerous because of dope heads roaming that area. On the way down, she heard some one coming up the trail singing and yelling, so she hid in the woods as they passed and then said later that those zonked out dopeheads were "religious people". I asked her how she knew and she said one would yell "Hallelujah" and the other would yell "Amen". For some reason, being around Vivi made me think of George Burns wife.
Anyway, thats the background on Vivi leading up to the Extrasensory Perception stuff.
There wasnt much gold reported south of Prescott but since it was close to home, I was doing some hunting there with a metal detector. Vivi accompanied me one day and while I detected she was searching around for a special herb to cure her Iguana,s from a case of the pip and puny. All of a sudden I heard her hollering for me to come over where she was. I was a little shook up, although she had assured me that snakes would never bite her. I ran over there and Vivi was standing barefoot on that rough and rocky desert ground with her arms waving at the sky and saying "The Power, the power, dont you feel the power?" She explained that this was one of those special spots where the magnetic lines of force are much stronger than average. I always figured that her liver would quiver or something over those power spots but that's just my theory.
About that time, a guy named Harold came walking up to us and told me I shouldn't be metal detecting on someone else's claim, that I and Vivi were standing exactly in the spot where the claim owner had found a bunch of really nice nuggets. Vivi had found the "power" right exactly in the middle of what was known as the Lucky Boy nugget patch. I got Vivi out of there before that guy realized how valuable she was as a sort of bird dog for nuggets.
I couldnt convince Vivi to bird dog for me. She said she would object to me disturbing the ground in those special Power spots. I promised I would only pick up the surface nuggets but she wouldnt buy that either. Danged women. She fed old Papa Iguana some of the special herbs she found and he died, all four feet of him. Vivi was heartbroken but I couldn't help but feel she was being punished for not bird dogging nuggets for me.
Vivi got a job teaching Yoga at the local college and I went back to metal detecting and searching for power spots. Now and then, I would get a funny feeling like maybe I was standing in a special power spot loaded with nuggets but it was usually just bursitus or something in my left ankle, which is what made me remember this story of Vivi. Nice memories of a nice Lady. A little strange maybe, to some of us who aint been to college, but a nice lady and an interesting friend...........
,hold on,i forgot something,she's a NUT!!