Yesterday I was in Wal-Mart buying a bag of Purina
bite size dog chow for my dog and was about to check
out.
A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did
she think I had, PIGEONS ?
Since I was tired and feeling whimsical, I told her
that no I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting
the Purina Diet again. I explained that I probably
shouldn't be going back on this diet because I'd ended
up in the hospital last time, although I'd lost 50
pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward
with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in
both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and
that the way that it works is to load your purse with the Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry
and that the food is nutritionally complete - so I was
going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled
with my story).
Horrified , she asked if I ended up in intensive care
because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no; that
I had stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's butt
and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart
attack, he was laughing so hard!
Bubba ain't allowed to shop there anymore.
bite size dog chow for my dog and was about to check
out.
A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did
she think I had, PIGEONS ?
Since I was tired and feeling whimsical, I told her
that no I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting
the Purina Diet again. I explained that I probably
shouldn't be going back on this diet because I'd ended
up in the hospital last time, although I'd lost 50
pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward
with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in
both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and
that the way that it works is to load your purse with the Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry
and that the food is nutritionally complete - so I was
going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled
with my story).
Horrified , she asked if I ended up in intensive care
because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no; that
I had stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's butt
and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart
attack, he was laughing so hard!
Bubba ain't allowed to shop there anymore.
I really thought it was gonna be a good find. 