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Best Comeback Line Ever :super:

Royal

Well-known member
In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, 22 year old white male, in a pumpkin patch 11:38 p.m. On Friday night.



On Monday, at the Wanango County (PA) courthouse, Lawrence was charged with lewd and lascivious Behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication.



The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch on his way home from a drinking session when he decided to stop, "You know how a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around for miles or at least I thought there wasn't anyone around," he stated in a telephone interview. Lawrence went on to say, "I pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that felt appropriate for the purpose, cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy my alleged need." "Guess I was really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment.

In the process of doing the deed, Lawrence failed to notice an approaching police car and was unaware of his audience until Officer Brenda Taylor approached him. "'It was an unusual situation, that's for sure,"' said Officer Taylor, "I walked up to Lawrence and he's just banging away at this Pumpkin," Officer Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence, "I said, Excuse me sir, but do you realize that you're having sex with a pumpkin?"



"He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then he looked me straight in the face and said, "A pumpkin? Shit, is it midnight already?'"



This was in the Washington Post's title of the article: "Best Come Back Line Ever!"
 
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